its mr.spongebob squarepants!

went to chermaine's hse today, after maths srp.
did ABIT of maths. lols.
used com, chatted, played psp & EAT!
mengsoon & quack came for while.
chatted, played, continue eating. LOLS!
lend some shows from her, gonna atch it some day. :D
sexy gave me her spongbob toy that she've bought quite some time.
lols, its cute!!

first time i've encountered this kinda situation in such a short period of a relationship. i really dont know what to do, think, say. all i feel is that you would rather spend time with cards/gambling than me. most of us think it that way too. although you've accompanied me for awhile, you're just physically beside me. but not mentally, you're just thinking of playing. dont think i dont know, i know okay. &so does the frens around me. maybe i should just try my best to tolerate ba. now i know how mama always feel, this was the fucking first time that i had this kinda feeling & its very uncomfortable. want to cry also cannot, tried to hold my tears the whole day alrd. tried crying on the bus, but cant-mama&ahjie was watching. so hold back. nvm. i've been so moody these few days, & i dont know why. so many things happened. family, school, brother, you. sians. sometimes i wish that i didnt exist. sighs. so, just lead my life, day by day.

i think i love you, but i missed you.

i'm sorry if i'm being unfair. its that you & "you" are totally 360 degree different, & its a 360 degree change in my love life. maybe i need time to adapt? maybe i shall try to close 1/2 eyes? maybe i shall just act as nth's happened? maybe i'll just hack care?

maybe, maybe, maybe.

DEAREST sister,

i seriously wish you all the best. thanks for being there with me whenever i'm down. & gimme advices , being my listening ear and always making me laugh/cheering me up up up! you also know, i'll always find you when i wanna break down, & find someone to accompany me. thanks for always coming down to find me. even if you're busy, eating or at chalet you'll never fail to come. buying big packets of tissues for me when i wanna cry too. lols. you're a super great guy, & i wish you all the best man. really hope it will work out, or else i think "ahem" will regret it. i know you're having doubts abt everything. but think on the positive side man, thats what you always teach me. ever since last year, you've been the greatest sister i've ever had. :D

you used to listen to my doubts abt stuffs, troubles & all. but now, i'm surprised that its my turn to talk to you. & its your turn to have your doubts and stuffs. i know you're starting to get serious abt this. but what ever you do, what ever your choice is, i'll always be there to support you! dont forget alrights. seriously, i'm very glad that i've met you man. you're seriously one of them who will listen to me patiently & understand me. dont know how to explain how glad i am to know you&those beloved ladies.. :D thank you, you're the best. ily all, &ily sister!

i'm trying to hold on the my tears. :'(